20090829

Gods Inc VI

This is the sixth write up in this series called Gods Inc. To read the previous stories click on the label on the right.


Due to the dire strait in the world economy and misjudged investments by the God - the program to update us Me74's was on a hold for the past few months.

If you are new reader here - just to catch up. I am a Me74 with 23 others like me that are strewn all over the world - world in this case is EARTH INC - one of the major companies in the God's Inc Portfolio. I have been sent here to simply collect data and not analyze or think and transmit this data so that it allows for research of better machines to be produced in the future. In the past few months due to some bad investments God had to sell of Pluto and some other asteroids in order to collect money to revive Earth Inc. He along with the major corporations of Saturn LLC, Jupiter Megamachines and Mercury Mania - all three major producers of thinking machines - got a stimulus package from the Intergalactic Bank.

So finally due to this stimulus - Me74 - the program that was put on the shelf is resuscitated.

I have started to work in full swing and here is the first piece of data that I am supplying. 51 years ago - God's Inc had partnered with Plastic Metamorphosis Corp, that is situated in the outer rims of galaxy. They had meticulously planned a Highly Effective Entertainment Module called Jackson. Today being his 51st anniversary of implementation - this investment by God seems to have worked fine as many pods that meander on Earth Inc in these part of the factory premises are blaring Jackson's oratory refined sensations over and over again to pay tribute to him. Well my task as usual does not end there - I was to collect data to find out why this Mega Machine disintegrated before its time.

This was a special update that I was wired to when they revived me. The whole machine that plastic Metamorphosis designed for Jackson was working fine. They had designed so that a dark skinned machine slowly metamorphosed into a white skinned machine. They also supplied the necessary parts to change the nasal cavities, the ear lobes, the lips to make it look more realistic. Their program was immaculate baring one glitch - the time line on the program was 50 years and then after that 50 years the machine was supposed to metamorphose into dark skin thus giving it a longevity. At the time of implementation scientist from Plastic Metamorpohsis only had been able to design the first part and at that time GOD because he wanted to gain Industrial Supremacy insisted that they implement Jackson and then take the 50 odd years to research and upgrade him to last another 50 years.

As always once Jackson was implemented and highly successful - GOD became lazy on his payments to Plastic - diverting his funds to more important developments like the Obama1 machine and clearing all the industrial sewage created by Bush 2. Thus Plastic to save its company still sent their agent - the Doc Man to insert the necessary supplements to revive the Jackson - but with lack of funding and disinterest from GOD - the plan was unsuccessful and thus the plug was pulled on Jackson.



You might wonder how I know all this data - usually I am supposed to only transmit. Well when I was in the storage yard waiting to be revived I met a senior analyst - Me61 - we share a drink once in a while and share data.

Since many of the interventions by God had failed for the past few months and his whole Economy was at a stand still - he devised newer modules whereby we machines could interact and collect data - one such module is called Facebook - where I was allowed to intervene for the past few months.

Before writing this I had called the data center of God's Inc. I have found out from Me61 that it is somewhere in a place called Noida in India. Seems that India and another factory next to it called China had been implemented with reproductive machines. It worked wonders whereby these machines have produced 33% of the factory workers for Earth Inc. But again due to insider trading before implementing these machines - God's Inc CEO Satan Killorama - who was responsible for this deal hid the fact from all the investors that these reproductive machines cannot be stopped.

Satan had an idea that once this big investment fails he will dethrone God and take over the control of Earth Inc. But he is laying low because he had not anticipated the big problem his one lie will lead to. Due to 33% of the weight of all the machines is on one side of the Earth Inc property - vast resources have to be sent there for their survival - all this has led to tremendous weight on one side thus changing the tilt of the Earth Inc property.

Earth Inc was designed with a 23 degrees tilt to the rotate around Furnace Sun - to give ample rest to its machines in a period of 12 hour cycles. Also infused in it were weather and seasons modules for the machines development. But due to this weight gain the tilt is now 23.5 degrees and thus has created a chaotic situation aptly called the Green Revolution - Green is the color of the extra money that Satan made by hiding the facts.

Buzzz.....damn I have been called for a special teleconference. I will have to take a leave and interact later - that is if they suddenly dont shelf us again.



18 comments:

Jaggu said...

Nice to see you back. And you picked up a great person to write on. May his soul rest in peace.

Ria said...

good to c a post from ur side after a long long time....nice read abt God Inc! :P

brocasarea said...

welcome back with a fiction+facts story:)

Sparkling said...

Lol!

So now I know why it takes you two months to write post - data collection, huh? :p

♥ÐÅyÐяєÅмє®♥ said...

So ME74 wen u gonna write abt god' new creating MW :P

and population blast and reproductive machines comparison was awesome :P

Pavi!!!! said...

Glad to have forced you to think.n this post did have the usual spunk that God’s Inc posts have..so good to know everything is the same. 

ceedy said...

@jaggu

Thanks bud!

ceedy said...

@ria

Thanks for being patient and not bugged like you are bugged at mondays for me not being around :P

ceedy said...

@broca

Glad you liked it - thanks

ceedy said...

@sparkling

From Still to Sparkling - did you just ingest lot of beans :P to emit this gas ;)

Yeah lot of data collection ;)

ceedy said...

@daydreamer

Good idea - I will talk to the authorities and write about MW

and thanks ;) remember this is the series of post after which you started to come here and READ not skip the post ;)

ceedy said...

@pavi

Yes....thank you...

and things are still the same everywhere....just some more grey hairs thats it ;)

Abhishek Khanna said...

ceedy bhai .. tum apni matriz type movie series launch kar sakte ho is funde pe.. awesome hai!!

Abreysham said...

so God isn't so sure abt His Investments either. It is all a big business deal for Him isnt it. He doesn't care :/

How does he plan to rectify the tilt? Or is this going to be another of those hare-brained schemes of His to eventually throw everybody off-balance?

Satish Bolla said...

bhai, i don't see a solid reason for u to skip this place. u wrote this post so convincingly that an asshole like me might believe that this is all true.

this post is as good as the plot of matrix(the first part, though)

ceedy said...

@abhishek

Thanks bud...sochta hoon you are the second person to compare it to matrix! :0

ceedy said...

@abreysham

Like we humans are to learn till you die - so does god - and since he is immortal - he is always a student...

he dictates life with trial and error :)

And the tilt will only change when the next mistake happens or he deals with fix-a-tilt company based out of mercury

ceedy said...

@satish

Skipping this place - not writing - has finally allowed me make you confess that you are an asshole - what more could I ask :)

Thanks for the matrix connection bro - you are the second person saying that